Mistress of Death

It was, as I recall,
A dark December night.
Neither moon nor star
Hung o'er those dismal moments.

There I stood,
Gazing through the looking glass.
Through crimsoned eyes
I viewed the sight.

The image I saw
Was of my face not.
In a robe of gloaming mist
Was she standing.

A woman, a wraith,
A spirit of ancients,
Moldering and rotten,
With a silent hand outstretched.

Overwhelmingly familiar,
This.
Overwhelmingly uncomfortable,
This.

This eidolon did once more
Cause me to weep,
But unlike times past,
This woman now whispered.

"Why do you fear Death so?
Is it not the fate of all men?
King or commoner?
Truthful or thief?"

With tear-filled rage
I formed a fist
To smash the looking glass
And destroy the phantom.

But the vision remained
One thousand times in the shards,
Mirrored shards of loneliness
That stabbed me deeper with each passing breath.

Beckoned by one thousand spirits of ancients
With their silent hands outstretched.
And with my head down and my eyes gouged,
I followed.

---

Originally written:    July 12, 2003
Put online:    July 20, 2003
Discussion:    In this poem, the character is repeatedly haunted by the vision in the mirror. On the last encounter, this Angel of Death speaks and unpleasantness ensues, culminating with the character's death. The character did not commit suicide but rather suddenly reached the realization that he was going to die at that very moment (the "stabbing" part is figurative, not literal). The "head down" part indicates defeat or dejection. The "eyes gouged" part indicates blindness or the character not knowing where he is about to go. Together, they form a metaphor that implies that the character is powerless and maybe even (at this point) unwilling to resist. Not only does the character not know where he's about to go, but he can't know. Yet, the character still follows; he follows the mistress to his death.


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