Seasonal Affective Disorder


There exists an ailment called Seasonal Affective Disorder. It is typically characterized by depression, sadness, and lethargy during the winter months because of shorter days, lack of sunlight, etc. I have seasonal affective disorder...but during the summer.

I hate summer. It's hot, it's humid, it's bug-ridden, everything is alive and green, I have allergies, there are too many people out doing things, it's too sunny, the days are too long and the nights too short, and it gets ridiculously busy where I work. Perhaps the worst thing about summer is that I can't write during this season. For proof, check the dates on which most of my poems were written. This environment simply is not conducive to my poetry. It's hard to write about icicles, darkness, and barren trees when it's 80°F, the sun is out at 8:30 PM, and there are birds chirping.

This isn't to say the ideas aren't still there. They're just more incomplete. For example, the idea for a poem usually starts out with several lines but with a general theme/story already in my head. With a little time, work, and patience, this eventually turns into a poem. In the summer, however, there may only be a few words but without the general underlying story. I cannot get any sort of completed idea. When this (the few words/no real poem) happens in the winter, however, I can still come up with something by lighting some black candles, sitting in the dark, playing some tunes, and contemplating everything. Not so in the summer. It's hard to think about lighting candles when it's 85°F in ones apartment.

This whole summer/winter thing is also why I believe the best metal comes from Europe (that and the domestic U.S. record companies, but that's another topic). The white sand beaches and sun of California (where, presumably, many musicians live) are no match for the snows of Norway when it comes to doom metal. Though I'm not particularly fond of much of the "Seattle sound," look at the difference in environments between there and California and the angst-ridden lyrics so commonly heard from Seattle.

Though the poetry is lost to me during the warmer months, I can still write...somewhat. I come up with tripe like this essay and other musings that don't seem to be so environmentally dependent. I much prefer to write poetry, which is good because my favorite seasons are winter and autumn (in that order). If given the choice between 25°F and 75°F, I'd choose the former over the latter. I much prefer eight inches of cold, clean snow to warm, green grass. With all that I dislike about summer, I do enjoy one aspect of it--women in Jogbras. But that's another story.




Originally written:    May 20, 2001
Put online:    May 20, 2001
Discussion:    N/A


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